I Know What I Can Do

I’m sitting at a table

Surrounded by my friends

Then I see you standing there

And the old rush starts again

I recognize that feeling

I know where it can lead

That ancient little story

Saying you’re what I need

That I need you to love me

To tell me I'm okay

Like somehow your wanting me

Would take my pain away

But I see the lie now

I know what I can do

So I close my eyes and pray

God, show me what is true

Free me from the fantasy

That their love could make me whole

When I let their approval define me

Their rejection burns like coal

My body knows the pattern

Before my mind can speak

Dopamine and longing

Promising relief

But I don’t have to follow

Every feeling that comes through

I can enjoy what I'm feeling

And pray for what is true

To know I can be happy

Without needing you

I don’t need you to love me

I don’t need you to choose me

I’m learning your approval

Was never what could fill me

(Could never fill me)

But I see the lie now

I know what it can do

So I close my eyes and pray

God, show me what is true

Free me from the fantasy

That their love could make me whole

When I let their approval define me

I let their rejection define me too

When I see you standing there

And the old rush starts again

I now can say a prayer

And let the healing in